Back to the Grind

Dear Blog,

Well hello there! How’s it been? I feel like I haven’t seen you in a long time. That’s because I’ve been completely swamped…with…things. Like Facebook. And Minecraft.

I know, I know. I’m sorry. I cheated on you with Facebook. I shouldn’t have done it. But it happened. Now can we move on?

Okay. Good. Thank you.

Love,

Aaron


 

What’s going on with me? A lot of things (including some Facebook and Minecraft). Classes for interterm have begun. Interterm is Chapman’s way of saying, “That class you never wanted to take but have to for a general education requirement? Yeah, we know you don’t want to do it. How about you just do it in a month and we’ll call it even!” I’m enrolled in an introduction to Ethics course and I am informally attending a class on Number Theory. The ethics class is a general education requirement. I think it’s fascinating, but there’s a certain undeniable dryness to philosophical essays. There’s this thing I do where I start reading down a page and I realize that all I’ve done is said the words out loud in my head without actually listening to myself. It’s really quite annoying when you get to the bottom of the page and realize you have no idea where the author went over the course of the page.

Number Theory, on the other hand, is pretty straightforward. And I like a bit of straightforward in my life now and then. Nobody asks whether two being a prime is in itself moral or immoral. Nor do people ask whether how 2, being prime, acts is moral or immoral. It’s just prime and that’s that. I know the world tends to not work like that, but numbers tend to, and for now, some absolutes in my life are pretty comforting.

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I’m not going to lie, I feel really strange being back. It’s this weird fluctuating state where I’m not sure if home is home or if this is home. I know in my mind the very good reasons why I feel this way, but then at the end of the day, when I want to just relax and put my mind to rest, it’s really hard to figure out where to settle down. Do I long for the day I get to go home, or do I focus my efforts on building up what comforts I have here?

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So anyhow, it’s certainly still an adjustment. Next month, when Spring semester actually begins, I think I’ll have a bit more to grasp onto in terms of constancy. For now, I just need to get through a bunch of Utilitarian, Kantian, Existential, and Non-Cognitivism essays and some divisibility proofs and I’m all set.

One comment

  1. I had the same problem with philosophy, which made me a really bad candidate for majoring in literature. But nevertheless I kept on with it (inertia is a powerful influence), even though the freshman lit teacher (the sort they make movies about) was replaced by possibly the dullest lecturer on earth. Didn’t have much of a grasp of making actual choices for myself at the time. You don’t sound nearly that naive. Hope you survive philosophy! You are actually in between “homes.” That’s the part about flying out of the nest – never quite know which branch you will land on. Hang in there!

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